I unsure of where to start.
Many different events have happened in this past year. Some of which were wonderful and others left marks on me that have scarred. By scarred, I mean a sort of irreparable damage left by a weapon that you cannot defend against.
A weapon that you yourself actually wield.
An inborn destructive/productive weapon that turns grown men into hollow shells and fragile women into warriors.
Events, or more importantly the emotions that follow; the whole gambit of them will make anyone’s life turn on a dime.
Without them you are dangerous and through them you are weak.
They are the bane of my existence but also the ambrosia and nectar of my life. All you must do is learn the ebb and flow, which is easier said than done.
I know.
But make sure that you are aware that sometimes there are flash floods that overwhelm you without warning.
Just make sure you don’t drown.
This should serve as a warning. Not all of my posts to follow will be dark and sad, but some will. I have a lot of things to deal with and some lesions that I don’t think will ever heal. I also have many good moments in life. Many that make me understand just how lucky I am to be here, on this earth, with the people who have the power to elicit these emotional weapons.
To draw them from places I have them sheathed.
I allow these people to wield these weapons against me.
I cooperate when they hold these weapons to my heart like sharpened dagger and threaten to end me.
I let this happen because of two things.
One is that I know that if that person does press that blade deep into my heart, rendering me lifeless, there are others around me to protect me and help me to heal.
And secondly, you will never feel so full of life than when someone you love has a razor edge a heartbeat away from you and you have never felt safer.
Many different events have happened in this past year. Some of which were wonderful and others left marks on me that have scarred. By scarred, I mean a sort of irreparable damage left by a weapon that you cannot defend against.
A weapon that you yourself actually wield.
An inborn destructive/productive weapon that turns grown men into hollow shells and fragile women into warriors.
Events, or more importantly the emotions that follow; the whole gambit of them will make anyone’s life turn on a dime.
Without them you are dangerous and through them you are weak.
They are the bane of my existence but also the ambrosia and nectar of my life. All you must do is learn the ebb and flow, which is easier said than done.
I know.
But make sure that you are aware that sometimes there are flash floods that overwhelm you without warning.
Just make sure you don’t drown.
This should serve as a warning. Not all of my posts to follow will be dark and sad, but some will. I have a lot of things to deal with and some lesions that I don’t think will ever heal. I also have many good moments in life. Many that make me understand just how lucky I am to be here, on this earth, with the people who have the power to elicit these emotional weapons.
To draw them from places I have them sheathed.
I allow these people to wield these weapons against me.
I cooperate when they hold these weapons to my heart like sharpened dagger and threaten to end me.
I let this happen because of two things.
One is that I know that if that person does press that blade deep into my heart, rendering me lifeless, there are others around me to protect me and help me to heal.
And secondly, you will never feel so full of life than when someone you love has a razor edge a heartbeat away from you and you have never felt safer.
No comments:
Post a Comment